Example letter. Names and amounts are made up for this example; they are not real prices or averages.
To my family,
These are my wishes for my funeral and what I would like spent on it, written down so you do not have to guess.
What I want done
Cremation
Scatter my ashes at the lake where we spent summers, or keep them, whichever is easier for you.
The service
A memorial service, without my body present
- Viewing
- No viewing
- Where
- The community room at the library, not a funeral home chapel.
- Who leads it
- My friend Jean, if she is willing.
- Music
- Something by Ella Fitzgerald.
No organ, please. - Readings
- Mary Oliver, "Wild Geese".
- Flowers
- Donations instead of flowers. Donations to: The public library's children's room.
What I would like spent
No more than $4,500 in all.
My budget: Cremation and memorial. These are the amounts I wrote down. Prices change, so ask the funeral home for its current price list.
| Item | Paid to | Amount |
|---|---|---|
| Basic services of funeral director and staffExample figure | Funeral home | $1,950 |
| Transfer of remains to the funeral homeExample figure | Funeral home | $395 |
| CremationExample figure | Funeral home | $425 |
| Alternative containerExample figure | Funeral home | $95 |
| Room rental and coffeeExample figure | Other | $300 |
| Certified death certificatesExample figure | Cash advance (paid to others) | $60 |
| Total of the amounts written | $3,225 | |
How it is paid
- A payable-on-death bank account
No, nothing is prepaid.
Where the papers are: The bank papers are in the blue folder in the hall desk, top drawer.
People
- Who should decide
- My daughter, Anne
- Please tell first
- Anne, Michael, Jean
- Where this letter is kept
- A printed copy is in the blue folder; Anne has a link.
Please do
Keep it short. Tell stories. Let the grandchildren pick the music.
Please don’t
Don't spend more than this letter says. Don't buy a casket for the cremation.
I have had a full and lucky life. Look after each other.
Ruth A.
This letter states wishes. It is not a will or a contract.